Saturday, December 24, 2005

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

I wanted to do a dreamy snowscape picture postcard of the dogs wearing their white furry Christmas collars with jingle bells but the dogs said not only no, but hell no.
They are not Christian dogs, more like animist ones, and they hate the furry collars because other dogs in the dogpark attack them and make fun of them and then need to be whupped back into obedience. Just kidding on the last part. No dog in its right mind would ever try to make fun of Henrietta; she is thirteen years old and the queen of any dogpark she goes to (unless there is a fourteen year old dog present).

Hank is doing very well for the time being, too. And I have opened most of my presents already! The nice thing about being an adult is that there is nobody who can tell me not to open my presents before Christmas, so I open them the minute they arrive. I have already eaten all the chocolate, for example, and my fridge door is full of poetry I made with the set someone (smooch!) sent me. It will produce a lot of bad poetry for this blog in the future though I have to translate it first.

Now for some holiday fun! Guess what the Republican National Committee's website said today? You got it. It said "Happy Holidays". With a picture of a tree, too. I hope that O'Reilly's eyes bulge out and never pop back in.

Then there is a new scientific study of tinfoil hats, well worth reading. Turns out that the tinfoil doesn't really protect us from government surveillance. But my tinfoil helmet does keep you from reading my thoughts so the aluminum foil is not completely wasted.

I wish you all the most wonderful Christmas and Hanukkah and Kwanzaa and so on that you can possibly imagine. My wishes don't make much real difference but I am also sending some snake energy your way. Ptuih! It's useful when you have to argue a wingnut next time. It will also turn your eyes bright green.

Love and kisses